"Melody and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day"

You will not believe what I am about to tell you. A tale of which epic proportions, and hilariously tragic happenings, are those only legends can compare with.
;)

It all takes place in Owasso, OK, on Thursday, the 1st of September. The subject of our tale, one Melody Woods, a commoner.

I'm such a dufus.

Today my sister wakes me up at 9 oclock, even though I dont work till 11. The reason, you ask? .....To fix her hair..... yes.....it just so happens she is a 24 year old who can't do her own hair. So, after i finish that masterpeice, I start getting ready for work, taking care to do my own hair and makeup perfectly since I have all this time on my hands. 10:30 rolls around and I make my way out to my car. "Ew," I think to myself. "Its already scorching out."

I then proceed to open my car door, and sit in my seat and am greeted by the most extremely-hideously-horrible, outlandishly-unbearable taste/smell/feeling all in one. Thinking there was a deadly gas leak of some sort that must most definitely ignite and my whole car explode I dive out of it onto the grass and roll away. I'm laying in the dirt dry-heaving from the exposure of it, and my eyes start burning intensely and watering like crazy. I'm in a panic! So I inch my way back to the car, since it didn't catch fire, and notice a vile sitting in the passenger seat, and a weird orangish-brown foamy spray everywhere. DEAR GOD SOMEONE TRIED TO POISON ME! nope.

Turns out, in my stupidity, the pepper spray my father had given me, I foolishly left sitting in my seat in the summer sun. The bottle exploded from the pressure- had to have been recently- from the strength of the odor. So, in other words, I accidentally pepper-sprayed myself. Now who does that happen to? Thats unbelievable! ONly me, thats who.

To top off the day, I had to go to work soon after, taking careful precautions to ride with the windows down. So, I arrive at work with horribly wind blown hair, smelling like pepper, with swollen eyes, no more visible makeup, and grass-stained clothing. What a sight for sore eyes. I also had to work from 11 a.m. to 10:30 p.m. because someone called in sick. So no flushing out my eyes, or changing clothes for melody. I HATE MY LIFE!