SLeepOver

My cousin came over this weekend to visit and we camped out in the livingroom:

Kitty!

Litter of barn kittens back in Owasso. Stayed with the rents, went okay i suppose. Bored outa my mind here in Norman.

Party favor....

So, i just got back from one of the first summer parties. It wasn't anything big just some people getting together to hang out. The cool thing about this party, is that I met SOMEONE! They are seriously the coolest person I have met this year. We had an instant connection with so many things in common. The funny part about the whole situation is that it is a girl. No, I am not becoming a lesbian! I know that is the first thing that came to everyone's mind. I do think that this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship though. We are a seriously scary match. I think perhaps we could be twins switched at birth. Shes a tomboy that plays rugby, likes action movies, camping, and wants a motorcycle! I had so much fun getting to know her. In fact, we started talking about martial arts and we made an appointment tomorrow to go to this brazilian ju jitsu place and sign up for lessons together! I am so glad I went to this party. Its just ironic that I went to a party and found a girl I want to get to know better, instead of a boy. After a while, I started to get very depressed though. She reminded me so much of what I USED to be like, it really brought to my attention how much I have changed. And I dont think it is for the better. Its like I'm the evil twin, or the cynical/worldly version. That really struck me. So at 3 a.m. when I got back to my apartment I stood in the grass at the complex in silence looking up at the stars in the clear night and I made an oath to myself....
then the sprinklers went off...

Summer has arrived...

So, I have been doing a lot of thinking recently, in view of the fact that I have a lot of alone time now. Laura should be enjoying her Hawaiian vacation right now, and Sarah is down enjoying her boyfriend's company in Texas. This whole job situation is really stressing me out. I don't think any normal 20 year old girl should have to worry about keeping up with two jobs to pay for everything, maintaining grades in college, and trying to keep some sort of social life (HA!). So I have been weighing my options (there aren't very many unfortunately). One I have been seriously considering is to join the Reserves. I went to see an Army recruiter and think it might be the best option for me. I've always admired people in the military. I have been praying about it, and hopefully I will get some insight soon.

I have been really down lately. And scapegoating all the blame on my family. They made me feel so inadequate, and I resented them for it. But, I need to take more responsibility. I'm so exhausted, mentally, emotionally, and physically. I could use all the prayers anyone has to give.

On another note, if anyone even reads this....I will be going home this weekend for a couple of days. Owasso-ites, give me a call and lets catch up.

*Drool

Yay for eye candy.

FINALS WEEK!

Yay for studying in the wee (3a.m.) hours of the morning in the library...
I think I accomplished the following:

1.Understand manifest and latent functions in education
2.Played paperfootball with Chris
3.Follow the depersonalization of medicine
4.Listened to an entire mix cd while adding my own percussion excerpts with my pencil.
5.Study demography and how it relates to environmental sociology
6.Draw a picture of myself with my favorite safari animal...which just happens to be a dog? (inside joke)

All in all, a very productive night.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Men

I never thought of myself as a man-basher. But recent occurences have led me to believe, try not to believe, believe, give another chance, believe, try one more final time, and believe once again -uncompromisingly- that men are above all just nuisances, and nothing more than complicated and sometimes dangerously hurtful playthings. Screw you if you respond otherwise. Its my freakin journal. I can rant if i want.

Some people who back me up on this view:

"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship." -Oscar Wilde

*sigh, this is true. Like in When Harry Met Sally, Harry makes the point there can be no friendship.

"The more I know about men the more I like dogs." - Gloria Allred

*someone had to say it. hell yeah girl!

"I refuse to consign the whole male sex to the nursery. I insist on believing that some men are my equals." - Brigid Brophy

*you can believe all you want (believe me ahahaha) i've tried. it aint gonna change nothing! (okie accent adds to seriousness)

Face it.

Pretend to be whoever you want to be,
but one of these days everyone will see
you scapegoat the blame.
You can't hide your indescretions forever,
so accidentally I became the lever,
of distruction to your name.
You can't take back the fact,
you are the one that broke our pact,
stop playing this foolish game.
You can hate me with all the bitterness in your heart,
the jealousy and paranoia doomed us from the start,
you're all I had and thats a shame.

Hookey

Migraines and I are like this (*crosses fingers in makeshift symbol of closeness and/or friendship). Thus goes my morning:

1.Woke up to alarm 7:30
2.Sat up
3.Grumbled something unintelligible
4.Smoothed out Marvin the Martian pajamas
5.Made an attempt to stand
6.Fell back and grasped head
7.Swore under breath
8.Dialed library
9.Yelled "TO HELL WITH YOU!"

BAH HUMBUG!