Take the Lead

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Ivy Walker: When we are married, will you dance with me? I find dancing very agreeable. Why can you not say what is in your head?
Lucius Hunt: Why can you not stop saying what is in yours? Why must you lead, when I want to lead? If I want to dance I will ask you to dance. If I want to speak I will open my mouth and speak. Everyone is forever plaguing me to speak further. Why? What good is it to tell you you are in my every thought from the time I wake? What good can come from my saying that I sometimes cannot think clearly or do my work properly? What gain can rise of my telling you the only time I feel fear as others do is when I think of you in harm? That is why I am on this porch, Ivy Walker. I fear for your safety before all others. And yes, I will dance with you on our wedding night. -The Village
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God, I love that movie.

I have a hard time stepping back and being passive in these situations. When I want what I want, I go after it. Even if that means driving across state on a whim to see someone, or blatenly telling the person I have feelings for them. It usually ends badly, with me being either embarrassed, or completely striken. But, as most people that know me understand, I have a 'no regrets' policy. This means that I will do just about anything, in order to banish any questions or regrets I might eventually have. So far this policy has been pretty beneficial. But, certain things I still believe- but don't usually act according to- are better left for the other party to initiate. Yes, I believe that men should make the moves, etc. Its just how its been done for hundreds of years and seems to have been a success. So, I try my hardest to wait...cause its the correct order of things.

So, I realize the end paragraph of my last entry must have left a lot of you very curious. Trust is something in a friendship that -with me- takes a long/hard time to achieve, and very easily lost. The story is that one of my "friends" betrayed and humiliated me very badly. I dont get angry very easily, I'm just a forgiving and "mellow" person, but I do still get hurt. I am not STONE COLD, regardless of what you may have witnessed of me. And I am still HUMAN, and I do have a vindictive/vengeful nature. And, sadly, I did get "bloody satisfaction" (line from Kill Bill vol. II) from writing my last entry. But I want you to know buddy that you shouldn't feel bad anymore, I'm over it and so should you be. Lets just move on, and see what happens.

THE END...